🐝 & ♘

♘> hes so stressed. We have a gut feeling the company he works for is sinking. We had one buckle under us with no notice just poof no job one Monday morning, so seeing this scares the fuck out of him. Hes done with the heat. Hes done with the crew. So hes finally going to persue an offer for a huge merging company who his BFF works for, this could be better benifits, more pay, and sun/monday would be his weekends.
I personallyhate change so im scared.
We had a rough start on our hike Saturday morning but the day improved, had his friends over some beers and some really good US time. I know his mind will be on this job change thing this week. Plus temps 105-113*f this week expected. So hes gunna be beat.

🐝> His Life’s been pulling him in so many directions. But he still finds time for the non-verbal communication. ( tagging me in a sweet Tumblr posts, checking mine, short quick texts, Ww/F turns, goodnights texts or posts) and that means so much to me. More than i can explain. Its small but priceless effort to let me know im still on your mind like your on mine. 17 days since our last date, i miss him like crazy. He improves my mood, makes me smile, and calms my mind with ease. We both have crazy busy lives (mines quieted a lot with 2/4 kids moved out) so im learning more patients. My walls are coming down. Im not sure if thats a good idea yet.

On a side note. My ex bf 🗼 keeps poking his head on social media, and random hi’s but nothings changed he still cant hold a conversation to where i feel he gives a fuck when asked “how are you?”

Changes and current events

So I was sorta seeing someone for about a month. Will call him (WM-boy). He got WAY more attached then I and well, it super complicated things. He was younger than i, by more than I should have a tempted to date. And his life goals and drive where completely non-existent. My life has so much drive, demand, chaos, he just was too damn needy for me. We still text for now. But the physical is over.

Last night pop had to go to ER. COPD complacations. Hes being kept and treated should be fine. I was there till 330a alone with pop. Kids and hubby asleep at home. And WM-BOY despite breaking up the same fucking day, texted with me until I got home safely. That’s the kind of care I want in a BF. I just need someone who’s trying to thrive in life not sitting having tea with depression until they have someone else to have tea with. *sigh*

As for “eyes”, no contact all weekend…. Monday is half over and I got nothing. BFF says let it go if I don’t hear from him by end of day monday. And I won’t lie not texting him sucks. I kinda saw way more potential there than I probably should have. *sigh*

Guess that mean I’m mono, for now. And that’s fine too. He and I have spent small chunks of time being playful and *in* love. Even our teens are grossed out by our love. Hehe.

I expect this week to be crazy. We shale see.
💙

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