🐝 & ♘

♘> hes so stressed. We have a gut feeling the company he works for is sinking. We had one buckle under us with no notice just poof no job one Monday morning, so seeing this scares the fuck out of him. Hes done with the heat. Hes done with the crew. So hes finally going to persue an offer for a huge merging company who his BFF works for, this could be better benifits, more pay, and sun/monday would be his weekends.
I personallyhate change so im scared.
We had a rough start on our hike Saturday morning but the day improved, had his friends over some beers and some really good US time. I know his mind will be on this job change thing this week. Plus temps 105-113*f this week expected. So hes gunna be beat.

🐝> His Life’s been pulling him in so many directions. But he still finds time for the non-verbal communication. ( tagging me in a sweet Tumblr posts, checking mine, short quick texts, Ww/F turns, goodnights texts or posts) and that means so much to me. More than i can explain. Its small but priceless effort to let me know im still on your mind like your on mine. 17 days since our last date, i miss him like crazy. He improves my mood, makes me smile, and calms my mind with ease. We both have crazy busy lives (mines quieted a lot with 2/4 kids moved out) so im learning more patients. My walls are coming down. Im not sure if thats a good idea yet.

On a side note. My ex bf 🗼 keeps poking his head on social media, and random hi’s but nothings changed he still cant hold a conversation to where i feel he gives a fuck when asked “how are you?”

My legs are weak, my fire is re lit, my heart is happy, what am amazing night. And im beyond words thankful for my metamor having the idea. I dont wanna change thier lifestyle, i just wanna spend time with him and so few understand that.

Im so in shock, its been so long since i felt the magic chemistry brings to the table.
7.14.17🐝

under-same-sky:

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I hear your nonverbal communication.
I see all your silent efforts.

One part of me screams run, fire is going to burn you.
While the other whispers but look at it warm glow.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Deleted from main blog…

Noobs

Talking to a new to poly guy i really am crushing hard on. Him and his wife are working out what works for them.… Im trying to be very patient with him and her. I majorly respect both of them. However i need them to have some clearer lines & bounderies drawn so i dont feel like i am having the door slammed in my face because they need space to talk out things. It sucks opening up and then left questioning who, what or when will the plug be pulled on things. If i hadn’t met his wife before, id swear he was lying about being poly. As so many guys do &have . I was once told;

“Im not dating your husband im dating you”

That felt so mean when Said to me but currently makes so much since. STILL NOT my approach too much respect i have.

Patience isnt my strong suit, but i gots a crush.

Everyones poly looks different.
Im married, my poly has hierarchy structure.
Some do, some dont.

I never want to cross a line in someone else marriage. I respect their marriage and personal boundaries.

Please dont let NRE make a mess of things.
Communcation and consent

I rarely make eye contact.
But last night i enjoyed staring at your eyes. Never thought I’d be so comfortable doing so. 6.9.17

2 dates this week

Tomorrow breakfast & hike with tower after an emotional mental dump saturday night who knows what monday morning’s date holds. I fear it might be us agreeing on a end.

Wednesday night with bumble bee cowboy lol -hubbys nickname for wilton guy… taking this slow. saw him and met his wife last weekend at the fair with hubby. im really looking forward to wednesday night.

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