When you long for meaningful connections with people but you are scared shitless to get close to someone new .
Not all relationships are definable in the usual way, that’s for sure. We wind up getting ourselves into very tight boxes due to the fact that everyone has these super-strict ideas about WHAT things are. What a “marriage” means. What a “long-term” relationship means. What an “open” relationship means. It’s really all just names and words. The key is to come to an understanding with yourself and your lovers/partners/friends. And everyone else can judge all they want, but the thing you construct is not up to them to name.
Amanda Palmer (via polyfreya)
Polyamorous issues nobody takes into account
- Giving weird relationship advice. I start all my sentences with “understanding that most people are monogamous.”
- Being the friend who doesn’t get what other people think is wrong with something. “So your upset because he looks at other women?” “Yes.” “He’s not cheating on you though. Right?” “Of course not! But he finds them attractive.” “So?”
- Find polyam pride stuff. Nobody makes it man.
- Headcannoning characters as your sexuality offends people. I get it you don’t want Jack Harkness to be polyamorous. But humor me.
- People who don’t get that its part of the LGBT+ greater community. We’re in this community too guys! Being against us is homophobic/heterosexist like it would be with any other queer group.
- Explaining that I’m not not polyam if I’m only dating one person. Bi people aren’t straight when dating someone of the opposite sex, I’m not monogamous when I’m dating only one person.
- Feeling like you have to “admit it” to crushes. I wish I didn’t feel like I have to warn people about this.
- Strong anti-cheating culture. I don’t support cheating either but when somebody says “you have to be with one person at a time or your a piece of shit” I feel bad about myself.
- The whole “if gays marry what’s next? polygamy?” umm idk i think that would be nice
- Finding other polyam people. We’re rare even among the queer community.
I don’t want perfect, I want honest.
When you love your initial partner so much and you have been together for almost a decade and are getting married to them soon and you meet a new partner that you immediately connect with and want those same things with them but know that it isn’t able to happen. Polyamory is so confusing and scary and wonderful at the same time when monogamy is the normalistic view.
(credit: @keyona-lynne)
Posting on Tumblr is like talking to your cat. You don’t know if they are listening, and you don’t know if they care, but for some reason, it still helps.
Turning point
During a conversation today it was brought up that effort to leave my comfort zone is what “won him” im really shocked. It was huge effort, no small task on my part. But i wanted that effort to be seen for how big it really was for me. I was trying to show him respect, interest, & transparency. Apparently it was huge to him as well.
Also, a smallish conversation today about how love is defined differently to each person.
Nothing lasts forever.
This WONT
But gosh i love it..
simple and as complicated as that.
So enjoy the now.
when you’re trying to help people who aren’t familiar with polyamory have a better understanding but they’re testing your patience
I wanna know what people assume about me because of my tumblr.
Put an assumption in my ask. I’ll confirm or dispute it. I’m not gonna be mean or anything, I’m just very interested. You can go anon if you want.
This. I’m curious
Fill my inbox. I’m damn curious about what you all think.😁
Perpetual Commotion 